My birthday is coming.
September 15th.
And this year, I decided to do something a little different. Instead of saying, “I don’t really need anything,” I sat down and made a list of ten things I would genuinely love for my birthday.
A laptop.
Button-like microphones.
iPhone 13 Pro Max.
Money.
Support for The Rooted Experience.
Flowers — roses and tulips.
A wig.
Black chunky heels.
A proper date night.
And a vacation somewhere like Diani or Nanyuki.
Nothing too crazy, right?
Well…
Maybe a little.
Because if we’re being honest, by sight, I definitely cannot afford most of these things.
But I went the extra mile.
I downloaded pictures of everything on my list.
I saved them.
I sent them to myself.
And as I looked at them, I laughed a little because there was something almost ridiculous about having pictures of things that aren’t currently within my reach.
But then I thought about faith.
There are things we pray for that, if we only looked at our current circumstances, would seem impossible.
There are dreams that don’t make financial sense yet.
There are doors we can’t see.
There are versions of ourselves we haven’t become.
And sometimes faith looks a little bit like allowing yourself to hope anyway.
I’m not saying that everything on my list will magically appear on September 15th.
I’m not treating God like a birthday genie.
I simply don’t want my current reality to become the limit of what I believe is possible.
So I made the list.
Maybe I’ll receive some of it.
Maybe I won’t.
Maybe I’ll receive things I never thought to ask for.
Maybe the greatest gift will have nothing to do with anything on that list.
But I like that I wrote it.
Because there is something beautiful about giving yourself permission to dream before you know how the dream will happen.
And perhaps that’s what I’m learning in this season:
Faith isn’t always knowing how. Sometimes it’s simply believing that God can.
So, yes, I’m walking into this birthday by faith.
Because by sight?
The list is definitely above my budget.
But thankfully, my God isn’t limited by my budget.
Maybe this is just a birthday wishlist.
Or maybe, years from now, I’ll find these words again and smile at the girl who wrote them.
The girl who didn’t have everything yet.
But dared to believe she could.
And perhaps she’ll look at that old list and realise that somewhere between the asking, the waiting and the becoming…
God was writing a story she couldn’t yet see.